


In the Beginning

by snae_b



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, And God said let there be smut, Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Explicit Sexual Content, Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), M/M, Pining, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Scene: Garden of Eden (Good Omens), Smut, Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), and God saw the smut, and it was good, and there was smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-25 02:26:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30082053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snae_b/pseuds/snae_b
Summary: Crawly and Aziraphale just want to see what all the fuss is about."Look. As far as I can tell you put the outie in the innie and wiggle it around. And then it's wham bam thank you ma'am." Crawly dusts his hands together. Grins. "Easy peasy."
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 148





	In the Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> A little silly a little sexy a little fluffy. Idiots trying to figure it out.

"Look. As far as I can tell you put the outie in the innie and wiggle it around. And then it's wham bam thank you ma'am." Crawly dusts his hands together. Grins. "Easy peasy."

Twelve days ago, Aziraphale had unloaded a flaming sword onto Adam and Eve, told a fib to God, and met a demon who asked a lot of questions. After patching that hole in the wall, he and Crawly had reluctantly teamed up to keep an eye on the two brand new humans with their brand new knowledge and brand new flaming sword. Plan how to best leverage their influence and acquire their souls for their respective sides. Both Aziraphale and Crawly had embarked on the journey a little wary, but happy for the company as they found their footing in these brand spanking new human corporations.

"But Crawly. We don't even _have_ innnies. Or outies for that matter. These corporations didn't come equipped with... that. Don't you think they'd have them if we were meant to... you know..." He gestures vaguely with his hands.

Crawly rolls his eyes. "They want us to blend in, don't they? No one else is wearing these muumuus." He holds up his arms so the sleeves of his robe drape. “Once we put on something more akin to what they're wearing it’s going to be obvious. They're going to know what's up if we're just smooth down there."

Aziraphale doesn't trust Crawly. Not really. But over the past twelve days they've developed a sort of bond. They keep each other company. And the conversation isn't half bad. And Aziraphale keeps finding himself lost in those big amber eyes. Like they... like maybe they meant something to him. Once. He has to look away. He keeps getting this funny feeling way down deep in the center of his corporation. He considers that smooth fleshy patch between his legs. Not even a dusting of hair like Adam and Eve. It does feel.... off.

"Look, Angel. All you have to do is snap your fingers and poof. There it is. Then we can figure out what all that fuss is about. You know you want to."

Aziraphale has been struggling to say no to Crawly since they set off into the desert together. He attributes it to his angelic nature. Plus, some things, he has convinced himself, are just self-preservation. For example, turns out corporations get cold. And it isn't a terribly pleasant feeling. Well Crawly had noticed that at night, when the chill sets in, Adam and Eve laid close together. Arms around one another. Flesh to flesh. Chest to chest. Or back to chest. Either way, _very_ close together. Crawly figured they must have a reason to do that. To get so close. So he had convinced Aziraphale to try it out one night. When the sun sank behind the dunes and the stars began to shimmer over head and the temperature plummeted around them, he and Crawly had pressed their skin up against one another. Aziraphale lying on his back with Crawly on top of him. His face resting on Aziraphale’s chest. And _goodness_. That was quite nice. Warm. Comfortable. Safe. Made that thing in his chest work a little harder than he anticipated, but Crawly didn't seem to mind the racket as he slept. (That was a rather peculiar thing about Crawly. He liked to sleep. It confounded Aziraphale, but he didn't mind per se.)

After that came the fruit. Crawly started wandering off and showing up with all kinds of juicy sweet things. Plump and ripe and tempting. Aziraphale could only imagine that they must have had occult origins. He hadn't seen a fruit tree since they'd left the garden. He knew he probably shouldn't be indulging. But there were those big round eyes every time. That little flash of pride (also a sin, but what else do you expect from a demon) that he had provided for them. That he had done something nice for Aziraphale. And they really were very good. Even if he was sure that he was succumbing to Crawly’s temptations. Wily serpent that he is. It didn’t help matters that if he ate them in the evening, he would get even warmer over night. His corporation doing something with all that sugar while he was all covered up with Crawly's gangly limbs and long soft waves. And so he would eat the fruit with a happy little wiggle and a smile and Crawly would watch him with his own satisfied smile and Aziraphale's middle would do that flippy floppy thing that it liked to do.

"Just snap my fingers?"

"Just like any other miracle."

Aziraphale chews at his lip. Looks back across the landscape toward Adam and Eve. They have found a little desert Oasis and are currently doing that little wiggle Crawly was talking about. Aziraphale had to admit that it looked like they were having a _very_ good time. And he was so curious about human custom. And concerned with fitting in. They’ll need practice for when there are more humans running around. He sighs and snaps his fingers and then jumps at the feeling of having genitals.

Crawly grins ear to ear. "Weird innit?"

Aziraphale lifts up his robe and they both gaze between his legs. Aziraphale glances back to Crawly's face. "Well... Did you?"

Crawly looks up. "Oh. Right." He snaps his own fingers and lifts up his robe too. They take turns peeking at each other. Admiring these brand new lumpy bits.

Aziraphale frowns. "Wait. We both have... outies."

Crawly frowns too. Gropes around between his legs for a minute. "I could've sworn.... Aha! There! Yeah. Totally an innie. Here. Turn around and bend over, let me have a look."

Aziraphale blushes a little, and isn't that strange? He isn't sure _why_. He clears his throat. "If you've got it, why don't you just do that part."

Crawly shrugs. "Sure. Ok."

They continue to stare at the new dangly things attached between their thighs. Crawly reaches out and pokes at his. Picks up his flaccid penis and inspects it carefully. Stretches it gently. Aziraphale follows his lead does the same. "So. Um. How exactly do I get this in there?" He gestures vaguely in the direction of Crawly's midsection. Crawly furrows his brow. Dips his hand low between his legs again and feels around again then shrugs.

"Dunno. Maybe we just kind of… squish it in there?"

Aziraphale glances at Adam and Eve sprawled out among the palms and greenery that surround a small aqua blue pool of water. "Should we lie down? That's how they're doing it." Crawly peeks at Adam and Eve and shrugs again. Lies down on his side, props up on an elbow and scrunches his robe up around his waist. Aziraphale blushes again as he looks at the soft curve of his bottom and thighs. Exposed to the late morning sun. Shadows cast from a gently swaying palm crisscrossing his skin.

Aziraphale lies down next to him. "Hmmm." He grabs himself and smooshes against that cleft between Crawly’s cheeks. He sighs. "Something isn't working." Crawly watches over his shoulder and nods in agreement. Aziraphale explores with his fingers, he isn't entirely sure where this hole even is. He dips between Crawly's cheeks and finds a peculiar pucker. Presses against the tight ring of muscle. Crawly flinches a little. "Is... is that the hole?"

"Only one down there."

"Feels a little... tight... doesn't it?" He rubs his finger in a little circle trying to figure it out and Crawly squirms.

"That. Um. That was interesting."

Aziraphale perks up. "Oh?" Aziraphale presses in further but Crawly scoots away.

"No. No nevermind. Not good." Aziraphale frowns. Adam and Eve make this look so easy. Crawly turns to face Aziraphale. "Maybe we should get closer. See what they're doing."

* * *

"Oh look! She's... She's putting his thing in her mouth. Maybe that's important?" Crawly and Aziraphale peer from behind a shrub. Try to be discreet. "It makes sense that maybe a little lubrication would help things out. That hole hardly even feels like a hole."

Crawly kneels down without hesitation, pulls up Aziraphale’s robe and puts Aziraphale's penis in his mouth. Aziraphale startles then giggles as Crawly holds him there. He talks around his cock. "Like this?"

A little tingle surges through Aziraphale's groin as his tongue undulates against the underside of him.

"Oh... Oh my..." Crawly's eyes flash. His pupils dilating at Aziraphale's reaction. "Um. Maybe." He swallows thickly. Stares down at those bottomless pupils, inching toward round with every passing second. "Move your mouth a bit?"

Crawly does something akin to swishing mouthwash around and Aziraphale giggles again. "Oh I... I don't think that's quite working." Crawly sucks in a frustrated breath. Hollows his cheeks. Aziraphale's hips twitch without his doing. Something is definitely happening. "Oh!" Crawly looks up. Excitement plastered across his face. He sucks again and Aziraphale's chin drops toward his chest. Crawly's pupils are as wide as saucers. He does it again and then wrenches away.

"It’s getting stiff!" They both stare down at Aziraphale's cock. Now hard and standing upright and slicked with Crawly’s saliva.

"Should we?" Aziraphale motions toward Crawly who nods and tugs Aziraphale to the ground before crawling into his lap. Aziraphale presses upwards and Crawly yelps and skitters backward.

"Nonono. That… nope."

They frown in unison. Aziraphale's erection starts to fade. "Maybe this thing isn't supposed to be so big. I was already wondering how it would fit. Now I really don't know. I wasn't expecting it to get _bigger_." He looks down at his erection, exasperated, and chews on his lip. "What if I..." He wets his finger in his mouth and holds it up. Crawly looks at him suspiciously. "I thought maybe we could see what size works. Then I can-" he mimes snapping his fingers and gestures toward his penis.

"Oh... ok. That's a good idea." Crawly pulls his robe over his head and scrunches it up into a loose ball. He tucks it under his head as he lays back. Knees bent. Thighs spread. Hands clasped gently together on his chest. Crimson hair flowing over the pale sand beneath him.

Aziraphale's insides do that annoying fluttery thing again that he can't figure out how to control. He scoots forward on his knees until he is slotted between Crawly's heels.

"Ready?"

"Yup."

As Aziraphale presses his thick, warm, wet finger to that tight little hole Crawly squirms. That interesting feeling returning. "Is this ok?"

Crawly nods. Takes a long breath and stares at the bright blue sky between palm fronds. Aziraphale presses in slowly. To his first knuckle. Then, when Crawly doesn't object, to the second. His hand stills and he stares at Crawly's face. Tries to read the expression there. "Well?"

Crawly scrunches his face. "It's.... Interesting." He feels pressure more than anything. A slight stretch. It isn't good. But it isn't bad either. Just new. "Maybe do the wiggle thing. In and out. Like they do."

Aziraphale nods. Focuses intently, brows drawn together. He begins to slowly move his finger in and out shallowly. Crawly squirms again. There is too much catch. Too much friction. The bit of saliva on Aziraphale's finger isn't really doing the trick anymore. He thinks for a moment and snaps his fingers again. Adds a little extra slip there. Aziraphale, not expecting the extra lubrication, plunges in faster and deeper than he means. Tip of his finger accidentally finding a little fleshy patch inside of Crawly and dragging against it. Crawly's eyes pop open wide. "Oh!"

Aziraphale freezes. Studies his face. "Was that a good 'oh'?"

Crawly smiles and nods excitedly. Aziraphale scrunches his face. "There's this... I don't know. It feels different. Here." He rubs at that spot curiously and Crawly gasps. His own cock perks up and he points in excitement.

"Keep... keep doing that."

Aziraphale can't tear his eyes away from the flush spreading across Crawly's chest. The way his body jumps as he rubs that spot again. The little gasps whispering over his lips as he rubs harder. They both look down at the place Aziraphale's finger disappears into Crawly's body, amazed.

Crawly bites his lip. His cheeks pink. "Should we, ya know." He holds up two fingers and Aziraphale gazes at them mouth, open.

"Oh. I mean. Do you think they'll both fit?"

"Only one way to find out."

As Aziraphale adds a second finger Crawly snaps again to make them slick. He groans quietly at the new stretch and Aziraphale stills his hand. Crawly's eyes are squeezed shut. Brows together.

"Are you ok?"

Crawly nods quickly. He sounds breathless when he speaks. "Y-yeah. Tip top Angel. It's... It's very nice. Don't stop. Please."

Aziraphale rocks his hand and Crawly squirms until Aziraphale grips his hip with his other hand. Holds him in place. That muscle in Aziraphale's chest is really hammering. He notices that his penis is hard again and he isn't really sure why. The whole situation doesn't exactly feel good for him. But his body is reacting anyway.

Crawly's body shivers under his hands. "Maybe... Maybe you'll fit now. A-and we can do it like Adam and Eve."

Aziraphale is nervous, but it felt good when Crawly squeezed his mouth around him. The heat and the clench around his fingers lead him to believe this might feel nice too. He can suddenly appreciate Adam and Eve's enthusiasm for this act. It's all rather exciting. He scoots forward. Supports himself on an elbow over Crawly's chest. The heat of his body surging and then waning with every ragged breath he takes. Aziraphale pushes his robe up around his waist. Crawly helps, a little more desperate than Aziraphale expected. It makes his belly tingle deep inside to watch his trembling fingers on that heavy fabric. Aziraphale takes the initiative this time around. Snaps his fingers to make things slick and lines up his cock, which he notes curiously seems to be leaking a milky fluid, with that now somewhat loosened hole. He presses forward an inch and Crawly's hands snap to his hip. Fingers digging in.

"Too much?" He starts to pull away but Crawly holds him firmly in place.

"Yes..." Crawly's head lolls to the side. “So much. Not enough. I…” Aziraphale is confused but he stays still. Remains in place. After several moments Crawly nods. Urges Aziraphale's hips forward. Aziraphale moves slowly. Like sap running down the side of a tree. Like glaciers receding. Crawly is shuddering and arching his back and clawing at Aziraphale’s waist and biceps but every time he tries to stop or asks if everything is ok, Crawly only nods and pulls him closer or digs his heels into his behind to push him forward further.

Aziraphale is so completely distracted by the writhing demon underneath of him that he hardly notices his own pleasure. That impossibly tight squeeze on what he is discovering is a _very_ sensitive part of his corporation. It is only when he is seated fully inside of Crawly that all of those sensations start to flood him. Suffocate him. Drown him. He suddenly understands completely how it can be too much, but not enough. He rests his forehead on Crawly's chest, the way he does at night sometimes. That muscle in _his_ chest is working too. He stays there. Listening. Basking in this completely new feeling until he feels Crawly rock his hips beneath him. And _oh_... Now that squeeze has _drag_. And isn't that a wonderful feeling. He gasps and begins to move his own hips. Slowly. Shallowly. Pulling back and then, before he is even halfway out, pressing back in.

Crawly makes a series of little high pitched breathy sounds as he drags across that special little patch inside. "More... Do more of that." Aziraphale nods. Pulls out and presses back in a little faster than the first time, but still so slow. He can feel Crawly's cock engorged between them. Trapped between their hot bellies. He can feel the dampness at its tip as it smears onto their skin with Aziraphale's every move. Crawly is whining. Impatient. He wants more. Wants it faster. Harder. He tells Aziraphale as much. Asks for it. _Begs_ for it.

Much to Aziraphale's surprise, hearing him beg makes his chest thump even faster. He wants to go faster but he wants to hear Crawly falling apart even more.

Crawly whimpers. "Please. I thought angels were supposed to be merciful."

Aziraphale smiles despite his best efforts not to. He's proven on more than once occasion over the past 12 days that he isn't always very good at being an angel. Crawly, on the other hand, has shown him time and time again that he once was. But he’s still a demon. He growls, long and low. Bares his teeth and flips Aziraphale onto his back. Slams his hips down. They both shout at the sudden flash of pleasure. Crawly folding forward under it. Aziraphale reaching out and grabbing at Crawly anywhere he can get his hands and finally relenting, thrusting awkwardly and gracelessly upward with his hips. Crawly moving at the same time but not quite in synch. Both of them chasing after this mind-blowing new feeling but not entirely sure how. They squelch and groan and their bodies sweat, which is new, and they get all kinds of little twitches and tremors that they are surprised to learn they can't control. It is awkward and messy and not very good, but at the same time _so, so_ good. Aziraphale finally grabs Crawly firmly enough that he stops trying to move so erratically. Stops working against him long enough for Aziraphale to set a rhythm. Slower than Crawly wants but the consistency is nice.

Aziraphale pants. "You should... you should touch yourself. It... Oh it feels really good." He doesn't want to admit to himself or anybody else that he wants to _watch_ Crawly touch himself. Wants to see him feel good. Crawly hesitates, unsure what exactly he should be doing and then finally grabs his cock. The thrusting underneath him transfers to his own body and his palm slides over his length and he nearly cries at the overload of sensations. He only manages to stroke himself twice more until suddenly he is falling all over again but in reverse. Dizzy and blissed out and awash in the greatest feeling he's ever known. A coil wound tight that has sprung loose inside of him. All that pleasure washing over him made even greater in juxtaposition to an eternity of torments in hell. His ears ring and every last muscle in his body tenses and he spills hot all over himself and Aziraphale. And as he begins to recover, he feels a heat spreading inside of himself too. Aziraphale taking that long deep dive right after him. The pressure and the heat and that look on Crawly's face rocketing him right over that edge. And even in the face of heaven it is the greatest pleasure he's ever known. And made even deeper by some peculiar trickle of energy coming from Crawly's core. This soft little glow that seeps out even though he tries his damnedest to push it down. Contain it. Hide it. It makes Aziraphale tingle almost as intensely as his first ever orgasm.

Crawly collapses onto his chest and those muscles inside of them, hearts it turns out, beat erratically but perfectly in synch with one another. Aziraphale can feel Crawly grin against his neck where his face has fallen. "I... I think I get what all the fuss is about."

Aziraphale smiles too. Sets his palm on his back and strokes him gently. Both of their hearts do a little flutter and just a little more of that soft, warm, quiet energy flows out of Crawly and wraps Aziraphale up tight. "Yes. Yes I think I do too."


End file.
